Taking a forced vacation from methotrexate due to a drug shortage led me to some interesting discoveries. The first few weeks off the drug, I felt great. Amazing, even. I was less tired; I had more energy; I got fewer headaches. But that didn’t last.
Enter phase two: what I like to call the “remembering why I was on MTX in the first place” phase. I hurt more, so I was exhausted all the time and short-tempered. My psoriasis came back on my scalp. My PsA was definitely much less well controlled—which is funny, because I didn’t think it was doing all that well even on the MTX.
But my awesome NP found a pharmacy that had a supply of the stuff coming in, so she sent in a scrip for me. It has the preservative, which is different but not bad. I took it for the first time in a long time last night, and I feel downright horrible today: nauseated, delightful headache, hot flashes—the whole nine yards. I don’t know if it’s a reaction to the preservative or just to getting back on my favourite highly toxic drug, but there it is. (And it’s not from mixing alcohol and MTX; I was DD for yesterday’s Super Bowl festivities, so I didn’t touch even a drop.)
When I first found out about the drug shortage, it seemed a little like Providence: Maybe this was a sign that I could get off one of the three main drugs I’m taking (which are MTX, Plaquenil and Enbrel) and still be OK. Maybe I can reduce my drug load a bit and still feel the same as I do on them. That turned out not to be the case. And while that definitely bums me out some, I’m glad that I can feel something close to normal even if it takes two injections and 42 pills per week to get there.